So potentially I could have an only child. This is considered, by some, as child abuse. Should I have another child even though it could reck and ravage my elderly frame with absolutely no ‘bounce’ back left and the hightened risks to the baby of conditions such as downs syndrome. Then there's the practicalities like, we only have two bedrooms, a small house, not a lot of money left after the mortgage, bills and now nursery fees are paid. Is this all irrelevant in comparison to the need of Erin to have a sibling? Would I be selfish not to provide this for her?
What if they just fight all the time and then don't get on as adults? I know a few only children who have really close relationships with their parents. Would I be hindering forging a close relationship with my daughter by spreading myself too thin by caring for two? I'm enjoying her so much at this wonderful age. We are really happy would having another jeopodise this?
Not forgetting I really don't know how people do it! I still stare at people with 2 plus children in wonderment. If they have 3 plus my jaw drops open and I stop in my tracks - are their kids easier to deal with? Do they not need as much sleep as me? Are they the nanny? Am I just not a natural at this?
My sister has two children and I watch them playing together and it is so nice for them and with two would selfishly mean less work for me in regards to playing! But my nephews also fight a lot and wind each other up which is a lot of work too. I had a flash the other day of Erin standing at the top of the stairs on Christmas day, aged 10, on her own looking so sad which made my chest ache.
Am I being totally self indulgent with this dilemma, maybe I wouldn’t be able to get pregnant again? I’m 35 my fertility is probably in a speedy decline.
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