Thursday 8 October 2015

Managing my post baby holiday expectations

There is nothing you want more during the first few months of having a baby than a holiday. The thing is holidays after a baby no longer have the same meaning. Your mind is still in before child mode of I’m really tired, been so busy, stressed and run down that I need a holiday - you need a break from this  – you book a holiday – take a holiday – come home feeling rested or tired but happy – you feel that you have had a break. Now if you go on holiday you will be taking most of the routine you need a break from with you, you will still be feeding your baby through the day and night, they may not sleep as well in a new environment, you will have to deal with a baby on a plane or a long car journey and possibly baby jet lag. It's not all bad, you may be having a break from the winter, a break from washing up, the 4 walls of the living room and be spending some quality time with your partner plus you'll have an extra pair of hands to help with the baby, and if travelling with friends or family several pairs of helping hands.

Our first weekend away was to a kayaking regatta in Nottingham when Erin was 6 months old. Desperate for a change of scenery I prepared with excited anticipation. Erin's stuff took up two thirds of the boot.

Usually we would camp but we treated ourselves to a b&b so we had a room with an ensuite and a cot was provided. During the day we were at the river side with the kayaking club. The river was lined with speakers announcing the race results and blasting out music in between so I had to breast feed Erin and put her down for her naps in the boot of the car amidst the goings on and to provide some shelter from the wind. We couldn't go out for dinner with the group when racing had finished as we had to get Erin back to the b&b for bath and bed after which we sat in the back garden with a dominos pizza for an hour (possible the highlight of the weekend) before creeping into the room. Erin woke more than usual through the night and we had to try and sooth her cries under the extra pressure from knowing that we were keeping the other b&b guests awake. We woke the next morning bleary eyed before driving the 3 hours home. Needless to say it wasn't the break I'd hoped for.

The long haul to Australia
When Erin was 10 months old we took her to Australia to meet her Dads side of the family. Surprisingly the flights weren't too bad, as they were mostly over night so Erin slept for a lot of it in the sky cot provided and she wasn't walking so was relatively easy to contain and we took it in turns to entertain her enabling the other to have a break. What we hadn't predicted was how bad her jet lag would be with her waking in the early hours (1am/2am) and being awake for a few hours before going back to sleep for three nights in a row when we got there. On the return home it took 2 weeks to get her back into her routine. This trip was more of a holiday, the best thing was having my other half off work for a month to help. We even went out for 2 or 3 evenings but couldn't leave until Erin was asleep at around 7.30 and were usually home in bed by 9.30-10 as we were up at 5.30am with her as the sun rising and the birds going ballistic was her daily wake up call.

A  successful holiday when Erin was 18 months to the Lake District followed, the planets aligned for an easy train journey both there and back with Erin now having toddler status and being more interactive she loved running and playing outside in the amazing landscape and having a great time with her Grandma and Grandad. Juggling her between the 4 of us meant some down time too.

Enjoying the great outdoors in The Lake District
                                                     
With our confidence boosted and expectations of a holiday well and truly realigned we thought we'd book a week away during late summer this year, just the three of us. There seemed to be two types of holiday available, firstly holidays to sunny Europe - cheap and cheerful, to the Costas with aqua play areas that looked the stuff of pre child nightmares or wholesome, more expensive, middle class holidays to cottages in Norfolk, Cornwall or the South of France.

Our old holiday criteria check list…
  • The more far flung the better
  • Culture
  • Off the beaten track
  • Excitement
  • Adventure
Our holiday search criteria now…
  • Western standards - low chance of Erin getting food poisoning & medical care available in case of an emergency
  • Not too hot – less chance of Erin getting sun stroke
  • Not too exotic – less chance of Mosquitos therefore less chance of malaria
  • Politically stable – low chance of us being caught up in an emergency situation
  • Short flight and transfer time
  • Pool
  • Fully catered – no washing up or cooking for a week
  • Sandy beach with calm waters
  • Crèche facilities
  • Children's activities
  • Separate bedroom or apartment preferred so can still talk at normal volume once Erin is in bed
  • Kitchenette and bath tub preferable

I liked the sound of a crèche or kids club but few seemed to cater for the under 2’s. And realistically it took Erin 5 months to settle into nursery so the chances of her settling into a new environment before the 7 day holiday was over were slim.

We ended up booking a week to Minorca to a 4 star all inclusive ‘child friendly' friendly hotel, staying in a one bedroom apartment with bathtub and kitchenette. There was a spa and a gym too! I packed my sports kit even though I knew I wouldn’t go.

Dawn in Minorca
On arrival the hotel proved to be the stuff of our pre-baby nightmares, children everywhere mostly of a similar age but now this was ideal! It was a lovely week spent taking in the simple pleasures of being together and outside, watching the waves, making sand castles, picking pebbles and shells off the beach and lots and lots of swimming. It was lovely for Erin to spend quality time with her dad away from the stresses and strains of the daily grind. I also enjoyed eating both cheese and chocolate at at the end of every meal and having either a beer or gin and tonic in my hand by 4pm everyday (OK 2pm).

Holidays are back! Just a little different.

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